Well the day finally arrived--showering my Tyler Hope! I truly couldn't have asked for a better day, better friends or a better shower. The day was absolutely perfect down to every last, special detail. (My friends are pretty amazing like that) It was 'brunch' themed of course; I could live off breakfast food--breakfast, brunch, brinner, whatever involves donuts and bacon is perfection in my eyes! We all know donuts have played an important role in my pregnancies (unfortunately delicious and addicting--but I promise I passed my glucose test with flying colors, somehow :) ) So we even had ourselves a 'donut bar' versus a cake, my kinda party! The day was filled with laughs, sarcasm, hilarious games, amazing food, perfect details, an overwhelming amount of generous gifts and a room filled with the best hearts in the world. (Special thanks to Andi Grant for capturing the shower; a few pictures posted below!) To say this day was somewhat 'dreaded' would be an understatement however...I told my friends and family I didn't need or want a shower, it almost didn't seem right--after-all, I already had a shower for my perfect Aubri girl (once again, thanks to my amazing friends). They insisted, said I was crazy and planned away. I'm so very thankful for that. Though this day was hard and every bit of bittersweet, it was much appreciated and much needed. Lets face it, every day will be hard for us, every experience tainted BUT Tyler deserves the best, a fresh start with family and friends that love and need her more than words can say. We are slowly learning that we can't stop LIVING. We can cry ourselves to sleep every night, and I do, but as long as we try, we get out of bed and go on with our routines, no matter how hard--then we have hope. Laying in bed with the why's and what-if's won't change anything, so we get up. Just because we smile doesn't mean we're healed or cured, lord knows there is no cure for this heartbreak--but I guess sometimes the mind just won't let you fully accept the unimaginable and so--we take each day one second at a time. Are we surviving this? Who knows, who could? But we're trying.
We will be going on 37 weeks this weekend, hard to believe! (and shooting a Wedding in Richmond, can't wait!!!) Everyone says 'man you're pregnancy is flying by!'; well I wish I could say I feel the same! We found out so early on that I feel like I've been pregnant for years--I'm a freakin Elephant! We are finally coming down to the wire now and we are filled with SO many overwhelming emotions--we're terrified, anxious, ecstatic and overjoyed--will those feelings ever change? Will the fear ever leave us, definitely not. Sometimes we find ourselves wondering why in the world do people have kids, why are we doing this to ourselves?! So many terrible things happen every day to the innocent, to the undeserving--life can be so unfair. So why? For that unconditional love. The purpose in your life that a child brings--the feeling of being a parent is like no other; once you have it, you need it forever. So we wait for the arrival of our Tyler Hope, surrounded by the most amazing family and friends, overwhelmed by unconditional love and gratitude for those that have been a constant in our lives.
